The always difficult first post

This blog isn’t just about me.  It is about bipolar.  It is about the amazing life that those of us that ‘suffer’ from bipolar live.  It is anonymous.  And I will not share anything about my family or friends.

You may occasionally see a post by another that has bipolar.  About them.  Their experiences.  Their lives.

We, who ‘suffer’ from this ‘disorder’ tend to live very secretive, secular lives.  We aren’t understood.  We can scare people.  We often scare ourselves.  Contrary to popular belief, bipolar is an internalized condition – usually those who endure life with this massive elephant in the room tend to hide.  Yet many amazing, innovative people throughout history have had bipolar.  We have innovated our world.  Given amazing art.  Sung amazing songs, created soulful and inspirational music.  We have taken people with our words to the darkside, and back again.  To the light and back again.  We have often seen the other side, often we visit it.  But it isn’t all about the depths of despair we can feel.  Not at all.

For me, I want to normalize bipolar.  We live WITH it.  It is PART of us.  We do suffer, yes we do.  Just like those with any physical disability, or illness.  We suffer.  

Bipolar is deadly.  Very deadly.  When a person dies from bipolar, I strive to remember that it was the condition that took them, not themselves.  It was that elephant, or demon, or that voice, or the fear, the despair.  That comes directly from having to live with bipolar.

I am not really well versed on the ins and outs of bipolar yet.  I have been diagnosed for close on two years now, on and off medications, through so many cycles I could do a mental Tour de France.  It is time for me personally to recognize my body, my mind, my mindfulness.  And learn.

I hope that my words, and the words of others, can bring some understanding forth.  From our perspective.  Not a medical one.  Not from an onlooker.  Just what we live with.  Day in, day out.

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5 thoughts on “The always difficult first post

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